Happiness or kindness?

So here it is, my first post. Where an annoymous person decides to rid of their problems by putting them on somebody elses shoulders. *silent pause* Its funny how we as humans have to find an outlet to make us happy, whether its running, painting or taking your dog out for a walk. We have to find something or someone to put our negative energy on. We are judged for having any sort of sad emotion, and advised to keep it in or let it out to a therapist or a hobby that we may or may not enjoy. Are we actually happy? Are we burdened from our problems or just relieved that the judging by others will briefly stop as we put on a front, determined to put on a happy face.

I’ve recently discovered that I am not truly happy, that i only can have a few brief moments of happiness before someone or myself takes it away from me, and im left walking around in my head searching for a reason why i should be. Do i find it? No. Just a couple of masks i can shove on my face to make myself come across as the happiest person who is loving life when really im waiting for the courage to end it.

Now it doesnt take courage to commit suicide, but it takes balls to convince your mind that your not able to move on as your worthless and have no future. But the thing is you do, if the certain people in your life truly love you or the strangers around you give you an oppurtunity with their respect and belief, you could have a future. Yet humans im afraid are selfish animals. We supposedly originate from gorillas, but even they are more compassionate and selfless then we are. Every gorilla in a family has a role, noone is left behind. Yet in this world we live in, anybody can. Whether you are the richest or the poorest person, any person who is ignored by their family, friends or random strangers on the street can be left behind. Any single person can be left to the dark,black abismal. However the ‘lonely’ rich people have a bed to sleep in whether they have support from relatives or not, the poor have nothing but the clothes on the back and a dimming light in their tummies slowly getting darker as the days of no future pass by. It takes one person, one person with an oppurtunity to pass on to another person. One single oppurtnity that can change somebodies life and perspective to convince that they are loved and appreciated. No matter what they have been through, it all comes down to the word ‘kindness’.

Kindness, what a beautiful word, what a happy thought to think the world was full of it, that every single person could bare in mind that every one is trying and to cut them some slack. Then the majority of people will never go through the grief and upset that others do, and without even taking their situations into consideration, we just simply give them kindess. From that singluar deliverance of kindness, we instantly receieve it, just like magic. “Poof”.